I am awake, yet again. After seeing the chicken stock dwindling day after day something had to be done and in due time two live animal traps were purchased at Orscheln. I'd set the trap, put some choice sardines in them and would go out the next day to fund the sardines gone, the trap shut but no animal in it. I fed the raccoons for another few days, but if you repeat the same actions and expect a different result you have to reassess your options, after some more wine that is. So last night I camped out on the mobile home porch. Couldn't use the fan because it makes so much noise that you can't hear what is going on, a nice balmy 90 degrees so it wasn't all that comfy. Got the gun loaded and with the safety on and a few flashlights next to me. I wake up from the slightest noise and so at 2 ish I hear a wood scratching and scoot to the coup to see a raccoon trying to get in. He looks at me rather sheepishly, caught in the flashlight beam, I look at him kind of sleepishly and shoot him, but the safety is still on and by the time I realize that he spears out of the situation and flashlight beam. Wake up right at 5 sun just over the field, awoken by the clattering of metal on metal, and lo and behold that coon is in the trap, having his nightly fish snack, and I observe the thing in the cage, seeing how he is working on getting out. Oh I feel good alright, I block the trap door with two big chunks of wood, and see him sit there and hiss. Going back to the porch, having a triumphant cigarette, too early in the day to smoke but hey.
I hear a hiss, and yes, caught one of my cats, again, of course my cat is way too dumb to get out.
Sitting there I see the wood move in front of the coon. And lo and behold it is slowly crawling out through a space the size of fleas birth canal. I run over, try to shoot but the gun jams. I get so mad that I turn the gun around and hit him over the head with the but of the gun, which breaks on impact. But it slows him down long enough that I can really FUCK HIM UP, yes, there is distinct hatred for a living being in my soul at that moment.
I am going back to Orschelns' today. I want my money back for these piece of shit traps (proudly made in the USA). How hard could it be to make a trap that works, maybe they should start with making a functioning bowling ball? Nowhere does it say on the trap that the device is only intended as a 5 minute delay mechanism in which you have to use guns, wood blocks, cattleprods rope and ductape.
And you know they sell a hundred thousand of those things, some kind of Wallstreet derivative scheme. Before you put this out and mass produce, wouldn't you think to at least try to see if it works. Really, trap a coon with a real trap, put it in yours and see how it works, and if it doesn't work, then ship those traps to China, because they do this to us all the time too, sending us their reject crap.
The only one that traps anything is Orscheln: unsuspecting consumers like me
Pieter Los, born in Scotland, raised in the Netherlands, lost in the USA. .